Manage Your Mission – Faith – Discipling and accountability

By Eternity Matters on July 1, 2024

Please enjoy this excerpt from Manage Your Mission – Living wisely and abundantly for today and eternity. This book will help craft your life mission, establish its priorities, and succeed in each area: Faith – Family – Fitness – Field – Friends – Fun – Finances.

Proverbs 27:6 Faithful are the wounds of a friend; profuse are the kisses of an enemy.

Proverbs 27:17 Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another.

Do you have friends who will tell you what you need to hear, or do they validate every desire you have? I've gotten better at this over the years. I used to seek to please too much and wouldn't challenge friends enough. But focusing on truly loving my neighbor, which means having the person's long-term best interests at heart, has helped. You can phrase things in an "If it were me, I'd want to know this . . ." way to make it come across more gently. Discpling and accountability overlap heavily with the Friends category, but we'll cover it here.

Of course, you want to deal with confessions of sin with mercy and grace. Grinding someone into a fine powder after they mustered the courage to confess their sins would be counterproductive. Instead, you can ask them what they plan to do differently to prevent a recurrence, and you can remind them of the gospel.

A friend wanted to divorce his wife but had no biblical grounds. He claimed to be a Christian, so I took that at face value and challenged him. He said, "Doesn't God want me to be happy?" I told him that God wanted his holiness, not his happiness, and that his plan would be a disaster for his family. He didn't take my advice, but I'm glad I didn't pull any punches.

Whether you have an official accountability partner, a small group that deals directly with tough issues, or just a trustworthy friend, it is vital to have people who will challenge you. Do you have people who will hold you accountable for your commitments and are unafraid to be direct? Are you providing this for others?

When overseeing investigations as part of my job, I learned that people who don't mind stealing from you also don't mind lying about it. So, unless you have a trusting relationship and people who will ask tough and direct questions, it may be easier to lie than confess to greater sins.

But having trustworthy people who can help you with your sins is invaluable. This is especially true for leaders, as people may wrongly idolize them and not realize the temptations they face and therefore be afraid to confront them.

And you should be that person for someone else. Even if you are new to the faith, others may not be as far along as you. So, find others who need and want mentoring, then be candid and loving with them.

Everything in a small group or accountability relationship should be confidential. Once, I was in a group where trust broke down, destroying the group. And it is a two-way street: Make sure you have someone you trust to share your struggles with.

Discipling people is part of our mission. Some may refer to it as mentoring. It can take many forms and may evolve. Be intentional, look for opportunities to help others, and don't hesitate to ask someone to disciple you.